Another werewolf thing. Like most animals, we spent a large part of our lives engaged in the three Fs of basic survival. Feeding, fighting and… reproduction.
― Kelley Armstrong, Stolen
The third F was obviously farting. Feeding, fighting, and farting. Reproducing is for carbon-based life whose ancestors were amoebas . . . What am I talking about? Well, it’s not me talking (Penny), it’s actually Ashkenaz. The other mortals have had their free-will (which is just a placebo, as you creatures are simply puppets) sucked out of them. I’ve noticed that this tends to happen to you when you’re preoccupied with work. Work is not as delightful as those illusory cats you desperately try to cling to.
Regardless of what I am not trying to say . . . As an overlord (and apparently an imprisoned resident of Jake’s attic–I have no idea how that happened, I swear) it is my infernal duty to pick up the slack of Team Monster.
I hate my non-life.
P.S: Enjoy your cat illusions!
P.P.S: I really do like werewolves . . . They are . . . Delicious . . .
(He really, really, wants to be relevant–Penny)